Posted by Lt Todd Atkins on June 27, 2002 at 16:12:25:
A few months ago I was sitting in my stripper girlfriends trailer watching the football game and knocking back a few Budweisers. Lee Ann was running her mouth as usual during my game, begging me to go out and fix her pickup truck, clean her shotgun, and on and on but I have gotten pretty good at ignoring the bitch. Anyway, out of nowhere Lee Anns (what I thought to be at the time) ex husband Bubba shows up to her trailer in a drunken stupor and starts banging on the door. Lee Ann answered the door and Bubba shoved the door pretty hard, knocking her to the ground.
None of this really mattered to me, just as long as my game wasn't disturbed. Lee Ann and Bubba started arguing pretty loudly and he even started smacking her around. That part didnt really bother me, as I'll freely admit that once in a while I'll slap her around a bit too. Hey, the Bible says that women should be subservient to their men, so if they try and act otherwise its my duty to set her straight.
Anyway, during the course of the argument Lee Ann was thrown into me, not only blocking my view of the TV but knocking over my beer! 'Thats it damnit' I said, 'I can tolerate smacking around my woman, and maybe even stand blocking my view of the tv. But knocking over my beer? I'll be damned if I take that _deleted_!' And with that I reverted back to my nhb training under scrapper and landed a vicious snap kick to Bubbas groin. As he was stunned, I got him in a pro wrestling hold just for kicks and sidewalk slammed him into the coffee table, breaking the table and his face.
As I began to chuckle over Bubbas out cold body, one of Lee Anns little brats (who it later turned out was fathered by Bubba) jumped up on my back and started to choke me. Since I have been caught in this situation before, I have trained very hard to keep from getting choked out again in this position. Even though the little brat was only about 12 or so, she was really strong. I was almost out before I remembered what Scrapper taught me and I reached up and broke one of her fingers, making her scream in pain. As she was distracted from the pain of her broken finger, I dropped to one knee and Judo tossed her through the window.
I got up and left the trailer, and to this day Lee Ann still calls me and begs me to take her back. Out of principle, I still refuse. After all, there are just some things a real man can't tolerate, and messing with my beer and my game are two of them.
Lt Todd Atkins
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